THC 17: Paul Herrmann & Bob Hansen | The Occupy Movement

00:00 In the 1930s, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt addressed the nation through a series of radio broadcast known as the Fireside Chats. His aim was to reassure the common man that our society would recover from its troubled times. From 1930 and I deal with a different kind of fire For a new era of worldly frustration we offer a- I'm Greg Carlwood the higher side ladies and gentlemen after a long hi smoke holes smoke drinking little drink from san diego great carlwood and joining me after an absence of four five episodes if you can light on fire hill smoking my buddy david's high body mhm and uh... from the last episode uh... we have

00:53 Paul Herman and Bob Hanson. Hey! You can see him at the La Jolla Comedy Store, and telling jokes wherever jokes are told. Saying stuff man doing things It's been about two months since doing an episode a lot of that has to do with me getting obsessed with the Occupy Wall Street movement Which if you told me six months ago that this was gonna be happening I wouldn't have believed it. I think it's pretty historic. I think it's the first Real global revolution even though I mean, I guess it may be small right now especially if you think about the percentage of You know how many people really are on the planet versus how many people are actually involved in the Occupy movement. It's like what 1% They're the one percent is that what you don't yeah and around about way it seems like it might be that But how do you guys doing? What do you guys think about it go ahead Paul Oh

01:48 I mean, it's cool. It's awesome that people are out talking about some of the issues that are important right now and that people are obviously upset about. I think its been really interesting to see like the double standard where you know recently we've had a lot of Tea Party protests and things like And now you've got the occupy which is obviously a different set of concerns or some of them are even linear concerns just from A different perspective But I it cracks me up when I watch a lot of the news and the media coverage on it, and they're you know There's this oh well these are just

02:29 Unorganized hippies that don't have a point and they just want to do drugs in the streets and all this shit And then when it's the tea party, it's a bunch of concerned patriots that are exercising their right to assemble To help him. I mean, it's such a Double standard in that sense But I guess that's one sliver of the media so you know Fox News and that kind of stuff right but it's been interesting I think it's uh It's cool. I think that Lot of people I read a poll today like a Gallup poll that said 37% of Americans supported The Occupy Movement and something like 34 percent of millionaires polled Supported the Occupy Movement, which was kind of cool to see but I think that a lot of people are wanting to see a more clear-cut Like what?

03:22 They want yeah, right. I mean like what'll make you go home? What'll make you because obviously you can't it's all anybody You can't protest in one spot forever because it does take a toll on that community and everything I mean, I'm sure that people work, you know, I think about when I was director of security at a hotel downtown It would have been a nightmare Dealing with this now because I would have been there like 20 hours a day dealing right, you know So, I mean there's gonna have to be not an end but probably a transition into more organized Movements that aren't just you know. I agree. I mean we had some serious protests one just here But yeah, I think they're still in the in the phase of numbers You know They're still on the face of look We need to grow

04:07 We know what we don't want. Right? We just need to know what we don't want and then we'll figure it the fuck out but everybody needs to, we need to stop at least reverse the brainwashing because I'm sure have you seen the I'm one of the 53% thing that they got going on What's that there's a there's another website like we are the 53 percent dot org or some shit and i think at that number yeah well the reason those honestly the reasoning out the numbers because they say there's a fifty three percent actually pays uh... taxed pays income tax whereas every the other percent gets our rebate so they're like you know What are you bitching about because you don't pay taxes? And so the one that got famous or the one that started it is a stupid asshole whose picture It says like, you know I've done two tours. I've been to tours in Iraq. I've done a tour and in Afghanistan I can't pay my college loans. I can't get a job

04:58 My house was foreclosed on my parents are broke, but I don't blame Wall Street And I don't bitch like I am the 53% It's like you're listing all the exact same things that people on the other side Would be saying on their list and you just change the percentage and you instead You're saying I completely disagree with what you guys are doing. You shall just get jobs. You know bullshit Well, I've seen a lot of those like the pictures it's like i work two jobs. I live within my mean you know I don't give a shit because guess what? I do the same goddamn thing and i actually understand that there are forces greater than us all like controlling all of this shit and it needs to change. Like capitalizing on society just needs to stop, so that's why I camped out for five days. Which I salute you for Jesus Christ! And I think where a lot of people...I had a really long

05:56 good discussion with a friend of mine last week who's very conservative and Republican and everything. He's a good guy, we disagree on politics but it was an interesting discussion I don't think capitalism is bad in itself i don't think it's wrong to be rich I think that the disparity and the amount that...the way the gap has has increased in the last 10 years is ridiculous. That's what... I mean, you're always gonna have rich people you're always gonna have poor people hopefully we'll always have a middle class but you know... I think both those guys are still around yeah yeah nice job

06:41 I would kind of disagree with you, but we'll get there. I personally slowly see the middle class failing. Well if it keeps on the way it is absolutely that's why I said hopefully we'll have a middle class because something has got to change. People should be able to have a job and work and put their kids through school and all that shit. That shouldn't be an outrageous dream I think there's no going back with the traditional model. I think this movement is trying to supersede, almost trying to transcend capitalism itself like if you really get into a lot of it Bob what do you see so far in this? The most impressive thing i've seen so far in Manhattan Is the Occupy Wall Street protesters and their ability to take Manhattan and actually get it to smell like The Bronx

07:27 very much and i thought that the aspen but they did it they didn't because they care music at yet exactly no end and ice icy why the the news was attacking is just a bunch of dirty hippies wanting to do drugs in the streets has let you know because uh... corporations on the media which i can see that's a bit so what also from a certain and i'd also did sees some of these same like by I camped out for five nights straight here in San Diego. And some of the things that I saw at night with the homeless people coming and actually getting food from the whole food setup, like there is a medical tent... It was a small little city inside of The Civic Center and it was pretty awesome! For me it was a hippie festival but in a City Administration building

08:22 and i found that entertaining because hippies are bad people they just want to sit there they want to love everyone in bring of across a quality new sampling the middle always heard their crazy target yeah well they are easy targets because they're selling themselves b but i mean But it's just an easy way to dismiss them. It's like if you can take away somebody's credibility, then you cripple their movement whatever it is I mean...it's like the discussion that was having last week when this guy was like oh well these people are protesting without permits and disrupting traffic and blah blah blah I'm like well the same could have been said about the civil rights movement

08:58 Who would issue a permit? Where do you get that permit? I'm going to disrupt the order of the day in the community. Can I- Will you give me my permit now? Those don't exist! I wanna be a shit disturber just for today. And I want fish, can I do both? Really? The homeless were the most interesting part about all of it is like there were people there who was like, yeah you know I fought in Vietnam and now i'm living on the streets because you know we're not taking care of the people who are fighting for our freedoms essentially. That's a whole other conversation! And I think it's interesting though that because the homeless has been a pretty good

09:41 Portion of the I mean from what? I understand you guys were there So you got yeah, it it was almost too It was to almost too much like my original plan Was you know when I was showing up down there. I was like I had all these flyers and I was like Why don't we organize The homeless community down here to at least just all sit in the same spot them are fucking crazy right I found that I dealt with you know when I was working downtown for years. I mean and lived down there for four years and You know, I feel for the homeless like anybody else but there's been so many shelters and clinics and places that help people with mental disabilities and mental challenges and things like that have been shut down. That they're just

10:26 you know, filling the streets now and it's sad but they're not necessarily rational individuals. And it's not like oh well they're all just druggies no like some of them have schizophrenia you know serious ailments without medication can be really dangerous. You would have to wonder how many protesters would develop the same symptoms if they stood out in a street too long It's just really kind of a foreboding thing to have them around like, oh this is what's gonna happen if we keep this up for a few days. Well and that that's what really gets at me like the only thing I expect or hope to see out of this whole entire thing is that people's eyes start to become more open that... Right! That's happening

11:06 yeah our government is spending trillions of dollars fighting wars that we don't even belong in when we can even take care of the people that are living on our streets like their families being forced to the streets because they're houses are being foreclosed you know they're losing their jobs like Our industrial nation is slowly dying and nobody like... It's failing the same way that every empire in the history of the world has. We're a modern day Rome! Our military is stretched too thin, we can't defend our own borders, our interests are so varied that we can't accomplish anything right? The-our politics are so polarized that Washington is at a complete gridlock and can't get anything done And uh yeah those are all signs of a failing empire

11:52 One of the big things I think that's getting under people are realizing is that this big transition to globalism is really just trying to say look you're gonna have to compete with those guys who are making iPhones for 10 cents a day. You're gonna have to compete guys, you know the unions are gonna-are just holding you back! If you want to be all unemployed that's fine we got jobs but Which is the most ridiculous argument ever because the job creators as they love to call them, the fucking ultra wealthy. Oh they're job creators we have to protect the job creators or they're gonna stop creating jobs all they've been doing is outsourcing jobs to other countries for decades I mean if you look at Nike a bunch of the automotive industry I mean all kinds of different companies have moved all those jobs overseas so that they can profit off of

12:38 Foreign labor people that are even poorer than our poor They have goddamn nets underneath the windows of the buildings where they make iPhones and other you know tech devices for us People that are jumping. Yes, literally yeah And they want us to be in competition at least they have a human resources department though I think That's always important HR is working for them Oh wow. Have you guys heard about the uh, there's a lot of popular YouTube videos obviously a lot of people have clicked on it The Topless Chicks in New York No, like a good like three or four of them. Like at least that will be on camera anyway and really nothing censored plane I just reckon YouTube and yeah, I mean it's mostly like you know Like short hair dykey sure you weren't thinking to you porn? no, no, actually YouTube which it was probably got taken down at this point But uh Yeah That was that was a popular thing And of course, um, and mr spectacle and everything else but Of course the problem again with the same thing with up the parting into drugging is it creates this image in the course The media is gonna focus on the wackiest one like

13:40 the same thing with you know conspiracy theories they're always gonna put the guy with tinfoil hat on the news because he's a more interesting guy and they could say look everyone who thinks like that is just like this so they go through a few thousand people pick the five craziest ones and then look, they're all crazy! And we all just kind of follow along which is very silly I did get a text by the way my friend uh, The greatest performer of all time. The Macho Man Randy Savage is gonna be here in a few minutes. No shit really? So i'm excited about that Hold on you're your friends with Macho Man Randy Savage dude A little bit yeah well I call him my friend he won't admit it He's a little weird with me but we'll get him in here in a few minutes That's badass Yeah he'll be on his way We'll see his take on that You know from an entertainer kind of Hollywood perspective See what he's got to say if anything or If we can make sense of it and don't tell them I said that

14:24 and I was terrible. Yeah, it's and it's for a peaceful movement to have stuff like that and like personally my take on a situation Like that is I think maybe the 1% or the people who don't want all this to go through are trying To rile people up in light trying to get right you know late

15:02 Think that's what the crackdown on dispensaries is in large part for those who don't know California's dispensaries have been ordered to shut down. I guess it would happen sometime soon They're not gonna shut down there was a big lawsuit pending about I wondered I wondered what the status was on that but ASA sued the federal government Yeah, so I mean whatever it's gonna be a shit show But I think the reason that this started was one to say hey you guys need to put this shit back in the box and You know, we gave you this. We can take this shit away." And I think the other reason is to maybe kind of co-opt the movement into a drug legalization thing or to throw that into it because it's all about distracting from banking and money and corporations if they can distract in any way make it about weed! We don't give a shit That's not what we make money on

15:55 And I think that might be a part of it also, but it is interesting that it didn't happen until the Occupy movement started gaining ground. Then all of sudden there's a crackdown on dispensaries Could be nothing I don't mean, I don't know if the two are gonna because it wasn't it wasn't even a lot of people were like Oh Obama's promised. He wasn't gonna do this which he did yes And then they thought okay well It's the Department of Justice it wasn't Obama or the Department of Justice it was actually just a couple of lawyers that decided that work on a federal level that decided to Send these statements and they ride it without a bunch of authority paid them to go forward. Well, totally That's obviously the conspiracy guy me but it's like yeah I mean that's a way they can get people to do shit So Obama doesn't have to take the heat in an election year or what is well It just it's always spin Like you've always got to look for this bit like okay with pulling the troops out of Iraq by the end of the year

16:53 Republicans are like what a horrible fucking stupid thing to do Obama's weak He's not willing to finish the war blah blah blah and then Democrats are like Oh, Bama. He's ending the war he's keeping this promise It was you know blah blah blah neither that Iraq said get the fuck out Like I rack doesn't want us there anymore they weren't able to come to a resolution to give an extension to the troops or So that mandate of having all operational troops out of Iraq by the end of 2011 was put into place when George Bush was still in office. Yeah, and I mean so it he doesn't deserve blame credit or crap like but it's all spent you know an election year man. It's a section here I'm just I'm tired to hearing about all the primary like they're all making bullshit how much way is they do it in Europe? You know where it's like a six-week campaign process

17:42 And then it's done. It's not like a year and half or two years of... Well, and it's that's what I mean you've got politicians that are constantly in campaign mode So how the fuck are they supposed to get anything done? Yeah. You know well That's the whole thing is that they are just for show so The longer they can extend that show the better it doesn't that's my opinion I don't think that they really do much And they and more they cannot keep their hands full of something to do the better off They look so people it's then an excuse like oh well I mean elections are huge thing obama's gallon coming up in a year and a half is only got a bucking for your election cycle but have it is going to be campaigned for that next election interestingly enough abc next thursday at eight p m uh... because what would five pm eastern time is doing of voting with the stars definitely check that out but this is just as an aside i think you know i was born so i can't wait

18:40 They pair up someone who's never voted with someone who is a professional voter. Yes, yes they do and then they fix both their votes as well. By the end of the season they're really good at casting a ballot. They sure are and that's going to be so sick! It's amazing how they do that But Dave you were referring to occupy San Diego in the past tense As if it had died and it's I mean because yes, it's been shut down. Yeah essentially Essentially there had like they're not allowing people to camp in the main area of the Civic Center They went through with cops and shut down the Children's Park location along with Balboa yeah so like

19:18 I walk by there on a regular basis to get on the trolley to head home from work. So it's late and i don't see anything going on anymore like The spirit I think died with a lot of the arrests. Is it possible to camping became too intense? Well, see again it's awesome that people are getting media coverage and these protests need to keep happening but an ongoing let's just I don't think that people pretending to be homeless is hurting the millionaires one bit. Okay, okay. I mean, I don't think millionaires are sitting in their penthouses like oh my god these guys are still living in tents maybe we should really reconsider what lifestyles are sucking back caviar and champagne like you've got a point but well I think we should just all stop playing

20:07 Yeah, well I mean that's kind of what they're doing dude. That is what they're doing like and there's ways to do that But I mean there I saw a thing today on Facebook organizing people and this was from friends. I had in the Occupy movement To pull money out of banks and put them into a credit you know which I'm doing this month. I'm party dead I'm closing all my accounts with chase cuz fuck them yeah for you And putting them all into credit unions so I think those are really positive things that actually have substance to them. I'm glad you brought that up because i feel like the credit union movement was a bit stronger, much more silent and even in the more legal movement than the uh... is gonna have less legal resistance than occupy wall street but at the same token have you seen some of the videos with people getting locked inside of chase bank? It was Chase right?

20:54 It did happen I guess. I don't know the bank again, but it's the YouTube videos right in New York and Some people walked into the bank they were holding signs. I don't think they were holding signs up They were just literally like holding signs like a bunch like a briefcase, and they went in to close their accounts. Because I guess they were having a conversation and then they're like shit why? I do have money in this god damn bank let's go get it out! And uh... They the-I don't know if is was the bank manager or what they shut the doors and they kept them there did not allow them to close their own accounts and then they were arrested and also heard that one of the big shit disturbers in that thing you know I have to look this up again but

21:41 If I remember correctly, one of the guys who was the loudest voice who was causing the most trouble in the group and trying to get other people riled up in the group ended up arresting people outside. He was undercover and he was provoking everybody. What do they call that? Entrapment? I believe so! But I mean we are a police state though. Absolutely and anyone that thinks differently is out of their mind and that's what a lot of people need to realize like people like my parents specifically They are bought and sold, and I love them to death but they're not seeing what i've seen or what I continue to see. They like to put on the tunnel vision as a lot of Americans have and be like... It's easier! Ignorance is bliss. Going to church and... You want to take the blue pill? Or the red pill?

22:35 I think it was like we're in a we're in like a zoo and there's you go to the zoo And there's animals that are happy that think that nothing's wrong because their little area is big enough for them, and they're like whatever most of But a lot of them are depressed born into that zoo though well see those animals. They captured not as happy Yeah You can tell there's definitely ones that are massively whales in SeaWorld I think what the one two curved fins were actually straight fins or what? Yeah Yeah, I hate all that shit. I try to go to the zoo because i would love to see some zoos like animal rescues and there's some that do it responsibly but like...I grew up with the Oakland Zoo which is a fucking lion in a 15 by 15 foot cage And they actually tear gas probably behind one now right? Exactly! I still think one of the best things was we went to the zoo one time and we were like oh a feline frenzy show

23:28 I have video of that that i'll put up while you explain what it is. Like, I thought It was gonna be a show where they have cats come out and do like acrobatics and stuff because i've seen that shit You know trained cats so we see this sign for feline frenzy And well i'm like guys I know you want to leave but if we can just chill for 45 minutes We can see this feline frenzy show and it's going to be sick. I want to see some cats doing backflips and whatever we get there and uh we sit in the front row and that is not at all what happens. We see some... Oh no, you gotta set it up perfectly because they're playing like 1990s jock jams like y'all ready for this? Yes! Which I didn't think was that

24:13 Was a giveaway because I would see cats doing backflips to some shit like that You know, and I wouldn't have been surprised but uh It was just some fucking young 20-something kids who were dressed in skin tight cat outfits And they started jumping on a trampoline and we're sitting there in the front row. Just watching this and I was like oh I'm glad we waited. Not at all what i thought was coming. You can go to Ocean Beach during Halloween and see the same thing, right? That's kind of silly Makes you wish you had a laser cutter. I was actually in ocean beach for halloween this year Oh yeah it was pretty entertaining oh it always is i lived there for about eight years they kicked me out because i took a drug test and uh passed damn yeah that was unfortunate

24:54 Really unfortunate about that. I always meet the most interesting people in OB actually like especially hanging out by the bonfires You can hear some great life stories whether you ask or not Yep, I just think it's hilarious that there's outlets on the streets so that homeless people can charge their cell phones I think That they really do There are! Go down to OBE and there's a...I've seen it a bunch of times And it's weird because you'll notice the cell phone and be like, what the fuck? And they're like that's mine. Leave it alone I once had a guy beg me for a retweet Buddy, I just need a couple more followers man Just to get me through a virtual breakfast Hey my friend Randy Savage is here

25:36 Dude I've been a huge fan Wow huge fan. I'm impressed Yeah, doing the thing great car would yeah higher side chats is my first time in the higher side chat See you and I want to tell you that dropped the elbow with zillions and zillions of times But never been higher than I am right now. Thank you very much for having me all right Alright, you're a handyman. That's so crazy. Shut up Bob Hanson! No one likes you and no one likes your silly voice. Well they don't just keep your mouth shut. Sorry dude I'm just trying to keep quiet. Yeah occupy Wall Street doing the thing yeah what'd i miss? Yeah man that's kind of what we were talking about What's your take on the occupy then I haven't I haven't heard much of you out in the media talking about it. I'll tell you right now something I'm the mean man of the hour too sweet to be sour funky like a monkey sky is the limit and space is The place occupy Wall Street yeah, I'm all over it like melted butter You can't stop me Yeah They've been all over the place protesting lifting right uh-huh And I gotta tell ya man not to beat a dead horse yeah but

26:35 I wonder if they could call it the Odorize Wall Street. It's getting a little bit silly, yeah you know? And uh...I understand what they're doing They're making their voices heard and nobody makes their voice heard like the Kingdom of Madness Yeah that's what it is! Well, Macho Man we don't really understand anything you just said. I think that cleared it all up actually. I fully understand his position. You gotta have a...you gotta know the savage dial. I'm just flabbergasted ya know? The problem Bob is that you don't understand me when i talk yeah total mental insanity million miles an hour slither with the snake sword the eagles and everywhere in between try to keep up alright doing a thing here.

27:27 Absolutely not. Yeah, that's a term we don't use around me because that involves Hulk Hogan and I don't want to get into that! He is a little bit sensitive, little too deep, little under the skin... Nobody has thicker skin than Randy Savage. Yeah, I'll tell you something right now. People are making their voices heard We're on the cusp of alleged volution Pardon me? I'm a little bit frazzled at the drive here in The Ring And ya know San Diego drivers don't do so well. Ya know that, pal Harmon But I'll tell you right now. Yeah revolution is upon us things are changing people are making their voices heard living off the edge of a lightning bolt doing the thing yeah Wow, I'm so glad that you've that you've jumped ship and Explosions in your order for what it is? Yeah, very very upset about that And that's why I came here on a podcast to talk about that yeah don't look at me Bob Don't even look at me Fuck you up man no It sucks when you meet your heroes and they

28:20 They just don't turn out to be everything that you thought they were gonna be. I'm a chameleon See, I-I don't know what his deal is but give him a second and we'll... Yeah when I met Dustin Diamond it was the same thing Just a huge disappointment I just, he just did a massive amount of disrespect. What were you expecting when you met Dustin Diamond? I don't know man... What was the anticipation like what could he have done to let you down He was the biggest name that came through The Columbia Mall in the time that i worked there and it's horribly sad! I went down to Claire's because I knew the manager there where she was having a conversation with him

28:57 He was kind of an asshole. I'll tell you he wouldn't be saved by the bell if he was in a ring with me. Who knew? I had a question for the Macho Man. Touche! Go right ahead, yeah. Alright, uh... So, did you ever really eat Slim Jim or was that like just... I don't get it. Every day all day morning noon and night 24 7 365 a year snap into it yeah I practice what I preach yeah say no to drugs doing the thing yeah too hot to handle too cold to hold I just wanted to slide that shameless plug in there. Yeah, because you just earned me an extra couple of thousand dollars even the Macho Man cannot Escape the grasp with the corporation. The wrath is seriously strong I've been in a ring with the biggest and the baddest than the best 500 pound Andre the giant to the immortal Hulk Hogan himself And I gotta tell you even I can't tackle Wall Street not a place that I like

29:53 I hear you, man. It's a goddamn mess out there. This really is ... in the past week they've cracked down harder than any time. They're seeing it gain steam and were hoping it would just melt away. And it hasn't because these cities that are doing it, they've made little communities inside. And I think if you ask what they're trying to do...I think if you really look at the what they are doing, I mean they're doing it! They have a medical tent, a comfort group, they have little groups that focus on needs and no one's getting paid there's no money circulating inside their of course they're running completely on donations

30:34 but you could also think of how it up moneyless society work randy do you think that slim jim would be willing to donate any money or so in order to let me know if they are good absolutely not no because he had to go ahead and make the mistake of trash industry Now I guess he's here goes window not anymore now. Thank you, man Me and Dave would like to challenge you and Dustin diamond to a tag-team hat I'll put the screech on those breaks any day of the week cuz they don't think I can count on them Yeah, I'd rather have the gay guy from that male The View show yeah give me that one

31:10 Dude, you step in the ring with us. You will be deader than you've been a long time Oh my goodness thankfully this was pre-taped and none of that happened yet don't even think about it Yeah, it's like back to the future just pretend that all makes sense we'll go with it But here's one of my questions I know we got a little out control retrospectively Let's keep going yeah but wasn't the coverage a little bit minimal at the beginning though wasn't Occupy Wall Street barely seen in the mainstream? Of course Tell me about It was the police brutality that got it out there. Of course, because that's the action. And if anybody just looks to the mainstream media and is like this is my source of truth...

31:48 They're blinded. I mean, a great example is... There's so many levels but that is one of the earliest ones. You have to wake up to the fact that corporate media has not opened yet. I always found it interesting whenever you say you saw something on the internet—YouTube's your big vid site and everything now—that people always say oh you got on the internet? Well just see some internet sites they always belittle the internet and then in the same breath they'll go well I don't trust mainstream media which isn't. Yeah, well you gotta check your facts on whether it's mainstream media or internet. I mean there are ways to do that But like a good example is that recently they there was a study that came out that showed that I don't know if you guys remember this when the all the scientific reports about global warming When they came out, there was this big controversy because they said the scientists fibbed these results right to try to drive their agenda and that got Fuckload of media coverage for months but what did he just they just recently released a report totally the opposite that has pretty much

32:50 Ended the debate to say yes these Scientific reports were real we knew that they were real and we tried to spin it And I mean, it's it's not there's no much that you can argue about it after this shit has come out and That got last week 24 seconds of news coverage which is a fraction of what the return of the McRib got and I think that's Like that show, that's a perfect job. That's a total and that was on either Colbert or Jon Stewart or something but I think that that it's a perfect example of what we're concerned about. The McRib is back! The McRib is back? Awesome, I didn't even know that. It's like a compressed Slim Jim with fucking barbecue sauce on it. Well I appreciate the compliment. That wasn't a compliment Would you snap into a McRib if McDonald's paid you enough? I would snap into a McRib anyway. I would snap into a McRib just by looking at it yeah because I'm thinking about thinking about thinking about doing something insane mmm yeah

33:52 Damn. Yeah, you can't ask this guy anything! You're not gonna get a straight answer It's like talking to Poody Tang Whatta ta? Sada te Man it is ridiculous The great thing about the internet is there's people say ah you know There's bullshit here and there's bullshit there Well the great thing about it Is that there's real stuff in there too Where as your mainstream media you have two three maybe four choices of bullshit And on the internet if you care enough to and its actually not that hard You can find real news And the great thing about video on your YouTube, people can belittle YouTube because there's so much silliness on it. But a video is a video somebody doing something to somebody doing something if you really and it works that when I cop punches a teenage girl on video A cop just punched a teenage girl in the right but You also have to do what? There's also a lot of conspiracy videos where people put together facts and do kind of a certain way at it is sir But well what you're saying is 100% true. I mean the video doesn't lie if you have

34:47 like that's the big thing with this got all some guy in oakland uh... this two-time war veteran who dots smoked with a flash Grenade and is almost dead nearly dead. I don't know if he's recovered yet at last I heard he was doing okay, but and then recovered a lot of Senses but not speech she still couldn't speak so I mean he'll probably recover which you know what's really sad about that Is that I heard that in Oakland with the Oakland PD? If the person doesn't die within the first seven days The officer doesn't get points for it So that's points like it likes speeding like I get on my license. No, no not like that I mean it's like a competition know they get like

35:33 Years almost over and it kills the office pool This one guy, you know if you wrote this this occupy thing down If it was if it did become history and you wrote the movie about it You would focus on this moment. It's like it's like he couldn't write a better story Perfect guy to get hit wasn't just some homeless asshole was a two-time war veteran and they hit the perfect guy and he's the perfect smarter for i would hope you'd makes it through that you know certainly wouldn't great hot ass i don't care now i think i think that if you get the actual is like a feel like its ever show their shoulders are well yeah it will be a lot of inappropriate i think this is the most uh...

36:19 the biggest showing of police brutality and the fact that we live in a police state widespread since the civil rights movement. And I think that's important, and i don't think people are just going to jump off board with that but... The movement has to evolve I think it has to evolve. It's still growing though and exploit that but they need to evolve into action in not just... I think they kind of are. You know what i mean? Like, In New York they go through different events and look at this! I don't know when this will air. It won't probably air tomorrow which is actually for us November 5th which IS Bank Transfer Day

36:56 But shit man that is a big deal because no matter how if you take out a couple million You know the way banks if you know anything about fractional reserve system. I mean they're leveraging at least nine to one yeah in some cases Unrestricted and well we let them regulate themselves, and that's what happens whether it's the oil industry or the financial Yeah, it's if you let people self-regulate I'm just saying that one million to them is much more because they can leverage that one million so many times over. So, I really do think it makes a bigger difference than they're going to make seem but an interesting fact about that...I did go the credit union and started up a new account

37:36 So I can close my banks as soon as my direct deposit forms transfers over, you know I gotta have my direct deposit transfer the new thing that's gonna take a couple and it sucks It's a big pain in the ass to switch back. It is it is But I definitely think people should do it They had if they had a sign in the lobby a big sign like shred your Big Bank credit card or debit card here And they're having a contest like if you could take a picture of yourself shredding it in this giant shredder You can win a thousand bucks there having fun San Diego credit, that's what I want right here and right here. You know what's also cool about it, which is not inconvenient All which I thought it would be they print your debit card there while you wait and you walk out with a debit card Just kind of badass Because with Chase obviously had to wait for mine in the mail. They picked my pin for me then I had to do some more bullshit but the point is The stats show this past month six hundred and fifty thousand people have joined There's been new accounts in credit unions and the year of 2010 there were 600,000 accounts open at credit unions

38:36 So in the past month they have fucking dominated and they told me down there They're like why are you joining? I'm like cuz I'm part of the Occupy thing honestly, and they were like we've heard that a lot You know our business has increased like four fold They said that some guy came in and told him on the fifth they're gonna be busing people in 50 at a time And so they should be staffed and they said that they're prepared. That's awesome, dude It was kind of inspiring I'd see that something that is tangible because I mean it's all a shell game with the banks as far as right You know, I mean there they're able to the derivatives market and everything that they've created is it's all fucking

39:11 is You know other people the table start blaming you they're like, you know, they're fucking up the cards. It's like you're ignoring the fact that But your but there are also ignoring the fact that the game is rigged They're ignoring the fact that they own they have a less than 50% chance and it's your fault It's your another players fault and that's what people are doing with this situation percentage

39:47 Well, no But they're totally they're just ignoring the fact that the whole game is rigged period and you're fighting an uphill battle And then it's the other players fault when really they're not the ones who are making you lose money It's the fact that you're in a losing game. And a lot of people are doing that with this bank transfer shit Is that they're saying that? You know you're gonna bring down the banks like that's gonna hurt the economy and you're gonna hurt a lot of people and it's like fuck You're you're not here do not get mad at me get mad at the people who are rigging the game Let me bring up two things right now. Yes Randy! Yeah if you play 21 blackjack around me it's a big mistake because if you say hit me I can

40:23 I get a little excited, yeah and you'll be on the floor counting the ring lights. I'm not a two-time heavyweight champion for no reason Greg Cardle! I don't know why i'm not but i'll tell ya this right now if everyone jumps from the banks to credit unions then don't we create alot of jobs at the credit unions? They're gonna need more manpower to handle the overload! This guy he's got it all solved. Don't screw around im very serious man Dave. I think i would just sweat myself a little bit. Yeah, I do it on purpose just to establish dominance really didn't need to tell you that but I did open gap That's the thing Dave if you haven't peed yourself he would have peed on you Just to mark his territory. That's phase two Let's not get too phase two. It's just I'm gonna wet myself right now just so I can avoid that hole Absolutely not yeah, you don't wear tassels and tights and be a tough guy

41:19 This fucking guy, Randy God. I'm so glad Randy... Oh man you... I'm glad you stopped by man. Didn't the Ultimate Warrior recently have some comments regarding I have absolutely no idea about the Ultimate Warrior. He's not here, he's not there, he's not anywhere! He isn't parts of knowing me. I'm sitting on the top of a throne at The Kingdom Of Madness. Yeah! Tell you Paul Herman right- I'm gonna call you Powerhouse. That's what we're going for right now. Yeah, Powerhouse Paul Herman unstoppable! Gotta see this guy. Oh yeah." Thanks Randy. That's an endorsement. God damn it. I have the weirdest friends.

42:09 But that's why I invited you. Shut up, bub! Oh damn... What happened? Yeah yeah he's not even at the microphone he's actually spitting in circles like this is back to us he's in a living room doing a wacky thing and now he's just done for him poor guy yeah he'll come back. Take a nap dude. He's pile driving your cat. Dude, she's young. You're gonna break her spine. Savage man good to have him on the show literal savage I don't get a lot of stuff with them anymore you know I'm busier now we're doing the thing Telling our jokes the banks oddly enough. I did open up a bar say opened the checking account They gave me a free toaster told me using in my bathtub That's not safe no it's not not I don't think they have my best interest at mine I Had ten bucks in my account spent on a new wallet. I'm terrible with money Paul

43:01 Saved it all for a rainy day by noon. I was broke Well, let's get to the question of what they want And I'd say, of course they are still in the phase of gaining steam and gaining numbers. What they want right now is to open up everyone's eyes that they are being taken advantage from multiple different angles. Name one facet of government that is working correctly? Name one arm of government that isn't working correctly? There ISN'T ONE! I think the third amendment is going well So far I haven't had any British soldiers living in my studio apartment. Right, they're...I mean fucking- No it's not a total loss! The Patriot Act is up all the way to help that. The Patriot Act? What do they just make sure they win all year? Just keep them in the Super Bowl? Is that their game? It's the biggest sports joke I'll ever make. Worst bill ever. Damn

43:59 No, and I think it's good that they're opening people's eyes to that because it's a conversation. That is long overdue And I will say as far as what I've seen from them I've seen everything from there's people there who are literally there to get Obama reelected They'd think that that's the solution There's people who were there who are Ron Paul supporters holding those signs up There's people who simply are holding up signs that say like, reinstate Glass-Steagall. Like that's gonna fix everything? And then there's people that are like topple government, topple capitalism transcend this whole economy and down with money and it's like yeah there are a lot of

44:41 voices that are not anywhere near the same concise thing. What they are concise on right now is that things are bad and the way things need to be changed in the way they are now but it's to what degree? I think something drastic is gonna have to happen before anything really changes like you can make minor changes but It's not going to just happen because 35% of Americans want to or whatever. You're right, like I said 2 million people globally are riding in the streets that is a drop in the goddamn bucket! That's nothing even in this country with 300-400 million people

45:30 Mean two million people riding. I mean if you're in a room of 400 people and two people are pissed off Does anyone give a shit? Takes an hour to notice right, I mean that you just assume that that's part of a room like there's just that a fraction of people But it's gonna be one how many times Paul have we've been doing a cheap plug at the La Jolla Comedy Store when things are sold out And it takes one or two assholes to ruin a show completely it's always the same thing is that you can spot them right when they walk in and that that is what happened oakland as a couple of assholes uh... yeah they were heckling yet but i don't happen well everybody left this no but they are date literally they went by yesterday at the end of the long

46:16 They were trying to shut down the city and they shut down one of the third major port in the US. They just stood around so that no trucks could move, nothing could happen and they just wanted to do their part to you know... See I don't think thats the answer either. That's where we get too is like what are they trying to do? Thats the whole excuse get us to riot so they can declare martial law All you're doing is exactly, you're playing into the hands of the people that call you unreasonable and anarchists and all this shit. If you can't come to the table with a... But they have something that I'm not saying it has to be totally centrist or anything but if you can't come to the table with a plan

46:54 You can bitch all you want, nobody's ever gonna take you really seriously until you have an idea of a better way to do it. And I mean it's tough like our congress, our executive branches of government is completely broken and dysfunctional due to corporate influence whether it's campaign financing or Lobbyists, I mean there's something like oh god. I don't even want to quote it because I'm gonna misrepresent the statistic but the number of lobbyists per congressman Yeah, it's gross It's disgusting yeah like so that's a fact that people make a complete over ten living like it's a lot The fact that people make a complete living off of influencing

47:37 Congressman for corporate influence, a corporate interest. It's uh... that's a broken fucking system! That's not gonna work I mean this is what we're getting at. The interest of the people is not being sought. Like it's just there's.... I personally think that you know if I would like to see and I would get excited about a politician that went in and said you know what? I'm just going to do one term I'm not gonna, i don't want to get re-elected because im not going to pander to the dumbest people in the fucking room. But dude you're getting at it. You're getting at what needs to happen and your jumping from talking about corporations like how do you fix that with id like to see a politician

48:21 blah, blah. And it's like you're coming like how do you get the corporate influence out of government? And get rid of the corporate power and keep the structure of a corporation I don't think you can and i think that this movement is not willing to take, a baby step i think This movement wants to make damn sure that this shit doesn't happen again it's not by reinstating glass-steagall It's not electing anyone. I don't think I Think we should all just not vote how do you get happen how do you get the corrupt out of it well now vote the people who will vote are old right that's not a lot about what i mean i thought about voting but has to be on our own and as for me some of those all white republicans or the same people were being affected by foreclosure that tried to buy into this system in her now but they blame that on the occupy movement they play metal bomber they blame that on

49:22 You know what I mean? They blame that on raising the taxes of the rich and granting more entitlement programs. You're not going to get everybody, but as it grows you're gonna see whatever can be done with this movement... The bigger it gets the more harsh the demands will be of it. If they can convince half the country that banking is corrupt All that 50% will agree that there's going to have to be a new currency. Now, that's fucking insanely radical and then it's like what I think they can if its not a currency...I mean.. I know alot of people are pushing for a resource based economy which is whole another game but I think you have to get rid of the profit motive entirely and I think that is very

50:13 at the core of occupy wall street i think a lot of people know that that's the root of the problem is the profit motive and that might mean what does that mean there's to get rid of them i don't think there's anything wrong with profiting as a businessman under ethical Regulations and things like that. I think what what is wrong? It's a lion that means needs to be tamed when you turn it Like, I don't think it's wrong for doctors to profit off of being able to help people I think it's wrong for them to profit at the levels that they are. I think it's bad for them to profit off of You know companies buying life insurance policies on their employees without telling them and then profiting off their debts It is it's wrong to profit off of creating a derivatives market where you give somebody alone And then you bet that they're not going to pay that loan off. Of course interest rates change That is wrong, but I don't think it's wrong to just

51:06 Because otherwise, I mean it's just... I don't know what to do and i'm kind of scared but uh, I kind of feel like we can't do this anymore greed is like anything else There's a certain little amount of it that's necessary as a survival instinct But like anything else if there's too much of it. It throws the balance off and everything fucking crumbles Well the problem, Powerhouse Paul Herman is that you go straight to the top. Yeah I bet you thought I was finished. No not at all! You go straight to the top of the ropes we have a very top turnbuckle and then beyond! Randy do you want a beer? Thank-you very much yeah. Is that you go to the very top of the mountain he got the Federal Reserve as always... We always have a private man here. I hear your are great driver by the way sorry I didn't want interrupt you.

52:06 I'm a big man, I can admit when i've been had yeah. That's why you cream of the crop! Yeah best of San Diego, La Jolla Comedy Store 916 Pearl Street doing the thing yeah Wednesday Thursday Sunday 8pm doors open at 7 don't be late doing the jokes but here is the deal Randy just get that shut up Here's the deal, Bob. I want to tell you all right now is that once you have a private bank controlling everybody's money the problem is always going to be there because Congress is controlled by the Federal Reserve and has no real power it's always gonna be right there yeah Yeah which the Federal Reserve is a fucking joke since they don't have any gold anyways Once we got taken off the gold standard that was pretty much the decision

52:46 Yeah, we should have done this 30-70 years ago. Rich people are gonna get really fucking rich and poor people are gonna get really poor like as soon as you took us off the gold standard that was... Well they're creating money out of thin air and it's always going to go back to that They always have the ability to do that I mean that's what I'm getting at with you guys is like What do you think is the baseline solution for a movement like this? Uh..I mean getting rid of The Federal Reserve would be a massive restructuring of our society And then obviously I go to the next step of transcending currency all together. Everyone's got their own theories and you guys actually, you were teasing Macho with The Warrior earlier. The Ultimate Warrior actually released a video couple days ago Yeah he did. Saw that? Saying we should stop buying... Makeup and all! Which only adds to his credibility Every politician i've seen wears a lot of makeup yeah I don't know why this was any different

53:39 He said it had something to do with the thunder of the gods from... Right, I mean it's very simple. It's like when a thunder of the gods align and then everyone will see the planet destroyed and enter parts unknown as a fallen warrior into ultimate reality that's very simple and everyone can understand that makes sense to me. Eloquent But nevertheless his solution was-and I'm fortunately simplifying him because I like The Warrior a lot but his solution was stop buying cell phones and crap just stop buying crap Which is kind of unrealistic, of course because right now we've come to a point where it's let's face if we like our crap We're addicted to our Facebook and our Twitters and all that shit And we kind of need it now people have entire businesses run off social networking And those kind of gadgets and everything else in social networking has been one of the key things that has helped be tied The Occupy Movement together and the civil rights movement didn't have that. That's what makes this so different and non-corruptible and they're exposing so much

54:36 Within this thing I think that the internet then that's been a big criticism. I've seen a picture going around Facebook and shit where it's you know It takes just a random photograph of the crowd at an Occupy and it draws arrows to all the corporate Technology devices that they're using there like, you know camera by Sony You know, it's like a sea of blue lights and uh, yeah Yeah And it's just its your missing the point entirely um We have we're of course they have that shit. They paid for it, right? We are it's the sunk cost kind of you know You already and it's you're still living in this society It doesn't mean you're not pissed off at the banking structure And you're not still pissed off about the way the phone is made you just you can't do anything about it But it doesn't mean like that's kind of what they're out there for and I think that what they're kind of doing especially In Liberty Square is your scene the

55:32 the realization, the manifestation of internet culture in the real world where everyone's about sharing. Everything is free and everything is open. They're about the open exchange of information they have a goddamn library there that full of conspiracy DVDs and I won't say just that books but all kinds of alternative like educate yourself to what's really happening kind of things And that is a complete manifestation of the types of information I've gotten from the internet. Like, I probably wouldn't be half as open... I wouldn't nearly be as open if it wasn't for the internet. That's just a ludicrous thought

56:12 Me and my father have had that conversation is he was raised Catholic, and he raised me in a Catholic school And then I'm like hey watch this documentary watch this documentary. You know I told my parents I was an atheist in high school It didn't go bad. My parents are pretty open and pretty cool it could have been for a lot of people I know in Missouri, it wouldn't have been fun. I had a weird week I tried to convert to Islam this week Really? I did! I went to the temple and the guy said to me hey if you convert You can have up to four wives. I said in that case forget it and

56:56 I've told him a lot of things and expose them to a lot of things And he's like on board with and he's like look. I didn't have access to that You know you've I've even shown the internet Yeah, that's the typical you know parents just don't understand technology thing But I'm sending those YouTube links if it's any consolation I think our children will have the opportunity to grow up without without a free and open Internet So at least we have that to look forward yeah right That's that's the one big fuck-up that the government Illuminati the corporations that's the one big fuck up they made is they they did not understand what free and open communication was capable It is really still the only Wild Wild West Is the wild

57:35 And corporations have seeped into it and tried to control it But I mean there's so many rogue networks like you can still get any goddamn movie for free You know you can still get any fucking song. I don't own a TV. I want and I watch I watch TV I don't have cable no yeah, why? If YouTube I've Hulu live this my friend the other day sent me a link who were to a Portuguese streaming thing I watched pay-per-views for free I watch wrestling pay-per-views for free if you could believe that. Unfortunately, somebody refuses to appear on them. You better not be looking at me! but i never less i watch stuff for free and uh... it's a joke it's a it's a god damn joke and everybody loves it and no one is really getting hurt except corporations you know any any guy who's just trying to be in a band who can't really make it with love for his fuckin song to be downloaded a hundred thousand times until the label signs them then he wants that all taken down well thats the thing yeah I mean there is like this, I have alot of people that are like oh why don't you post cuz ill..I have like a couple

58:38 clips posted on my YouTube page or whatever and people are like, why don't you post full sets? And I'm like so people can rip it off. so that you know I guess it's a little bit different than music where you know but i still think you guys should. I really don't understand the first time this week um here's what what I did, I had a 17 minute set from uh this place in uh Kearney Mesa you know because our club is a little strict on internet posting rules and all that stuff so I posted it but didn't tell anyone about it so the hits wouldn't be that big. I have a few subscribers the hits are only at 20 something I just sent it to my brother who wanted to see it, and this way I wouldn't have-I could still privatize and send him a link but then it might honestly confuse him because he's not very technologically gifted. So... I just sent it to him so that he can watch it! And you know, I have a few friends or whatever. And as stated, I didn't promote it. I never put it on Facebook. Hey look at this, I just left it there

59:26 And whatever, and now if I need to send it to an agent or manager potentially Or whatever. I can knock it down in five minutes or whatever Yeah it is 17 minutes of my best stuff But the hits stay they've been staying at 26 for like a week this and I'm not worried about it I'm leaving it there right because obviously no one's seeing it so yeah So I'm not worried about someone when he says stealing It doesn't mean stealing the video like comics feeling I know you literally copy material but I still think that uh I don't know You're always writing you're always evolving if you came up with that. You can come out with something else like somebody who's gonna steal the material I mean, I know comedy Right anyway they never tell it right? They're not gonna do it better that I mean That's a big thing in the comedy world. I know is that there's no real copyright laws or anything It's whoever gets on TV first with us

1:00:11 Because if you wrote a joke, even if people hundreds of people have seen you tell that joke If somebody else gets on TV and tells it you can never do that joke again I still kind of feel like if your if your funny or funny. You're gonna keep writing. You're gonna break the internet Well in like I said, I'll put up like 45 second clips or a minute clip But I don't want to put my whole set up there because then it doesn't give people an incentive to come out to the show That's fair. You know that's what I strategy, but I still think that I don't think if you cut it up You'll see that it works way better than It is way more benefits and there are negatives I mean a comic in that room with you could steal your material all the internet is is a bigger audience? It's just a larger audience like I said That's why put up you know little teasers But I don't want to put up the full

1:00:58 And some people don't go to clubs dude Don't you want people to just like you as a comic see you as a comic? Like I know you want people to come see that is a huge part of comedy. Yeah, but You have the choice of someone who isn't going to go to a comedy club Then becoming a fan or not becoming a fan wouldn't you choose? Fan we want us that we want to get them to be our fans about the only place were but The only way we would ever theoretically make money is by performing at a clubs We want them. We definitely can it's awesome if they like us on the internet true, but they got to come into the club Otherwise there's not gonna be any any money generated for real fans would But I think real fans do.

1:01:48 been doing a lot of that ever they have huge following still people understand uh... does not seem as far can also right he's really good building to stop us from taking our other cars are each others stuff is artists are on code and sense of ethics and the friendship really it's really all those That's all it's going to be regardless. And I think that, that...I don't think you should take-think of the internet as more exposure to being ripped off as you should just more exposure to a different audience like there's also people who, y'know, you perform in bars sometimes There's people who will see you in a bar because they would never go to the comedy store and thus you gained a fan There's people who are on the internet who are only gonna watch comedy on the Internet They might buy a CD on iTunes if you get it there they might come out and see you if they know They like you ahead of time But they're not just gonna come down to the Comedy Store on Sunday night and see the best-of show when they don't know anyone So I just think then that's not everyone obviously. That's not me You see me there constantly people do it's a light kind of spot

1:02:47 think about it as another audience, sometimes you might do a god damn bowling alley and people will see you there that wouldn't see in the comedy store. You should just want people to see you I understand you don't want your material to get sour or overplayed because You know you can't write a new fucking sick 30 minutes every week. Obviously so... I mean, you look at the best comic-I know we're way off on a tangent here The best comic in my opinion and I'm sure Bob will probably agree the best working stand up comic right now has got to be Louis CK Of course And he does an hour of new material every fucking year He comes out with an hour of new material So 60-and that's 5 minutes a month

1:03:35 He writes a new five minutes every month. Harder than it sounds, by the way. But that's harder than it fucking sounds! It is harder than it sounds. And because you have to do that material over and over and over again to polish it and make it right and get the timing down and facial expressions and everything that makes it a joke so... That's the best in business doing 60 Minutes of Year New. So I mean it takes time to You know what? What would you say Bob? Probably 80 minutes of material before you can even think about a Comedy Central special. Yeah, 80 before you can do 60 because things go wrong or whatever and I remember wanting to shut up! I'm gonna tell ya something right now... I've been in the entertainment business for zillions and zillions of years yeah any idea if you create a character

1:04:20 Yeah, if you create your own voice in an old special way that can be often imitated and never duplicated Then you have some special people are attaching supply and demand is meant because they can't copy. Oh I Have a question Randy. Yeah are those shorts an elastic product? What do you mean? It was an academic joke, never mind. I'm just curious Randy have you ever peed on Bob before? Because agency... You guys have an agency relationship? I pee on Bob first thing in the morning yeah before i even get out of bed I pee on bob and I hope he wasn't going to tell me a story. Before you even get out of bed? Don't even ask questions powerhouse policeman

1:04:57 They have a Bert and Ernie relationship. Unstoppable! Damn, yeah exactly. They're just roommates. He's in the danger zone right now. That was funny you wrote on Facebook you were like they finally put the Bert and Ernie issue to bed and I was like pun intended? Yeah literally to bed. I was really interested to see that George W Bush wrote his memoirs Really? I just have no interest in that I mean The real shit is... I just didn't know you could write a memoir in crayons Right That is funny. Also while we're talking about comedy one thing this changed since the last episode of shows I did my first three minutes at the comic store Bob led me up and then Paul did the door That was and I just you know, I appreciate the encouragement from you guys from Mike from fucking Gordon all you guys have come by I finally got there But

1:05:59 It's that was cool man. You look you look comfortable up there. Yeah, it was alright I mean First time I met Gordon he was high on mushrooms Actually the first time I met Paul we were yeah Gordon is actually the first comic that brought me on stage when I did my first really like yeah Wow He was hosting the all come in full circle We're all connected Indeed we are. That's the shit we were talking about on Mushrooms in the Shroomfest one It's scary up there under the lights, I mean people don't get it A lot of comments like to admit never being nervous which i never really got everyone is cooler than cool Yeah im always you know not nervous anymore but Im always a little anxious butterflies a little bit not intensely depending on what it is I guarantee if I was in the green room about to go on Conan or some crazy shit Id be a mess And me going out about to go up on Sunday night at the store as a different thing Like ehhhhhh I just need two minutes

1:06:51 You know, it's a different animal but you still need a couple minutes to be like alright. Alright I gotta do this is different. I'm not uh, I gotta get out of normal human mode It wasn't so bad It was nerve-racked going in and signing up when I signed up. I'm like I get the list I'm looking at the opening spots and I'm like third. I'll go third I could have gone so, you know. He had a lot of choices and I was like, I don't want to go first. Don't want to go last let's get this thing kind of over with but I need a couple of buffers yeah and Yeah, it went not so bad once you get up there if your if you feel like I'm sure you guys probably have similar feelings But if you feel like you can make a group of people laugh You've obviously done that before you wouldn't really think about doing comedy So once you get up there

1:07:34 Once you get used to the light for a minute, once you get your first laugh or two You start to be like oh this is just I've done this before. You know? I've zoned in on this before and it wasn't even as prepared as i am now. Right. So... You can talk to people there's no-I think that uh The most nervous moment for me at any set that I do ever Is right after second after the punchline of the first joke That's the most nerve-wracking. Because it tells me how it is going to go, what will happen and how hard I'm going to have to work or not work for the next 8 or 9 minutes That kind of tells me, that's the measuring stick. What am I dealing with? What is going to happen and everything else. I remember one time I came through the curtain. Yeah! Almost jumped from behind but a honky tonk man yeah Bob you were nowhere to be found. I was seven dude not an excuse. You should have been there but I'm gonna forgive ya because I'm all over the place. I'm a forgiving guy past is the past future is the future. I live in the present. Thank you very much.

1:08:35 I'm glad we got that covered dude, really. Hear this shit every day. It's getting old. What happened? Someone set off a fire alarm? What happened here guys?! No, but I actually thought it wasn't so bad. I mean, I need to do it again But where I had the crowd for little I did some material about work and just some normal shit And then when I went to military lost everybody but that's the shit that you're in a military team That's what's dear to my heart It's what's dear to go? I can tell you this the politics and their religion and the news and all that stuff You have to be really good before you can do that stuff

1:09:15 It's okay. That's you have to get them on your side and light make them like you and what your viewpoint is And also it tends to traditionally work a little better in bars than clubs because bars people are kind of drinking their minds on stuff They're whatever club does they really like they came there specifically for the dick joke So they're gonna get what I'm sorry, but I like comedy to think it sounds weird. It doesn't sound fine But just fine be that me just takes a lot of time most fans do real comedy fans People who are people who are really into it? I think that they're gonna say I mean, I don't know my favorites are Carlin Bill Hicks Yeah, but that's a specific crowd. Those are my favorite too. I love Bill Hicks. I loved Carlin totally grew up on that but like

1:10:00 People you have to like we always kind of joke that you have to play to the dumbest fucking person in the room Because they don't want half do that's what I think Carlos Mancilla has a career. Yeah, but that's fine I don't I don't want to be a carless man no No totally But I mean that's he's a douchebag completely Completely but your non comics, but audiences are too fucking I was watching I was uh I was DJing a show at A club that I frequent that I'll leave unnamed and That a couple weeks ago and the host was doing a Daniel Tosh bit. The guy that was hosting this show, he did like two minutes... He's good too by the way. But he is so specific again that's his niche and this guy was just doing his jokes And it was just like you know and those people will never get anywhere So I don't consider

1:10:54 When you say like real comedy fans, those are the people that are in the back of the room snickering at the meanest fucking jokes throughout the night because it takes so much to get them laugh. The rest of the audience is just there for the fluff they're there for escape It's like going into a movie and you have to be careful Like you can preach at the crowd but there has gotta be a punchline at the end of everything You know what I mean? Look, I mean i've done one three minute open mic. I'm not building a career of stand-up comedy and I shouldn't really be talking to you guys about it but my approach... ...I would say as like as I do more these if I keep doing it which I plan on is.. ..i'm gonna let that audience find me if there's even one there not assuming that anybody would like my standup but If there's an audience there I would want it to find me And I don't want to

1:11:46 tailor jokes to To just the lowest common denominator, and I think that you guys both try to work in You know little pieces that I like That's why you know I've asked you guys both to come out here And uh yeah I can tell it you're playing the crowd you both work at The Comedy Store your job is to entertain the people who come to that place But you have little lines part of you have little lines a little undertones on That you touch on the things that I'm like go deeper into that go deeper than shit But more than anyone else chances are went deeper into it four or five times already disaster right when get when its when comedy is your main thing the problem is You get to a point where you want to say this? You want to make this point and make that point and do all of this, and then suddenly you realize

1:12:33 on Well it was Ray Anderson, we know him but he was quoting a famous comic who said the whole thing was 80% for them 10% for you and 10% for both of you meaning you in the audience which meaning only 10 percent of your set should ideally really be just for you to satisfy you to make you more comfortable. Your real job is to find the half

1:13:11 Meet them halfway. Where's the half of Bob that meets the half of the people? Where can I have an extension so you're not being fake You're still being you but what part of me are they gonna like best and once I and again, I always play And I'm an old wrestling guy So I always played at a game with a baby face be the good guy Get him on your side. And then once you get him on their side, you can make whatever point you like Yes, yeah Anderson's more than he'll I use a similar technique where like if you notice most of my sets I'll almost always start out with self-deprecating stuff. I'l make fun of myself That's what I do, it's safer At first It's probably how growing up...I mean this is just assuming because that's the same way i started or the way I just naturally started to write It's like, it's the way you got people on your side before Same game Yeah and then you can say stuff thats outrageous but some of my favorite jokes Like some of the jokes that I loved I had to stop doing because crowds would just be

1:14:08 No, no visibly upset. Oh no wrong approach man I think that tonight can I hear one of those jokes? Promise a wrong approach but he needs that approach is probably one of the reasons he works there and I don't yeah Yeah, I mean I could be the angry guys an open mic on Wednesday I think the best comics though, the ones who shine throughout everyone else are the ones who are unequivocally themselves. But those comics had to follow the rules for a while until they got good enough to learn how to break the rules Right and that may be fair. That's a weird analogy, I guess but maybe the The right path I mean probably is I'm sure What makes comics laugh is different than what makes a general audience laugh? I mean comics are fucked up people in general so like you know like say okay one appreciate being fucked up One of the jokes I used to do that I really love that I had to stop doing was about the octo mom

1:15:05 And I was like, you know, I can't believe she's got like 14 kids or whatever She wants and she says she wants to get pregnant again. Mm-hmm It's like this is ridiculous if she gets pregnant again We need to take a stand somebody needs to roofie that bitch duct tape her to a table and make good use out of a coat hanger people were just Yeah, but people were that People were just like what the fuck is he talking? You can't duct tape a girl and force her to have an abortion. I mean, dude, I would lend you the coat hanger! And I love that...I will say I love the stuff that is just like jaw-dropping to be jaw dropping Yeah but hopefully you can become a better comic than that Hopefully you can write jokes that are more clever instead of just shock Well let me tell ya here's what was my favorite part of my set which was

1:15:56 obviously the downturn downward turn cuz right before i had a few good jokes about working at a corporate retail chain and hating it And I got a few good laughs because people could relate to that but it was all self-deprecating and then after a minute of that, I said But I haven't totally given up on myself for I would have just joined the military and from that But but I think that there were I saw some faces and they were like looking at each other and I'm like because really you know That there's a couple people that everybody knows who they only Made money because the military would take them and they weren't gonna get a job any other way And I think there is some truth to that Not that everybody in the military is in there because they're a piece of shit But there's a lot of pieces of shit in Military, and there are some truth to that but I mean There's pieces of shit everywhere right right? But I mean I just talking about Yeah exactly Even even as a comic if I just heard that write-off without the full explanation

1:17:00 Just or else I would have you know, I haven't given up on myself completely or I would have joined the military. I'd be like That's kind of laughing and a comic in us is comic in us at comic in us It's like that's the kiss to death right there Yeah No, I understand but I guess I mean you may as well just like I knew I knew that inside I knew that was the response I was gonna get but I was like To me, that's really funny. The problem is there are too many comics and mostly open mic guys do this more than anybody and stay at that level for this reason is that they only care what they think. Well you've done it once. He's talking about guys who have been doing it 6 or 7 years but still doing open mics

1:17:47 If you go up every week for a year, and that's the same way then I'd be like yeah The problem would be that you know your Insanity is doing the same thing entertaining audience exactly And it just never works in we're just doing it for their therapy which kills comedy because I hate Open mic girls even say this all time struck me fucking crazy. We're there. Just do this for therapy I just do it from me so I can feel better and talk about my problems palm is Nobody gives a shit about your problem. It's harsh and it's mean and whatever but the audience does not care about your They might give us shit if you can make it funny Yes, but they came there to forget their problems Yeah So do it And if you can express yourself in any way you want to and keep it funny Which is the whole part of the game? Of course we all have our gripes and our things We want to express so you can keep that funny then there you go And I know that um, I remember macho You were telling me something the other day was like oh yeah Let me tell you something right now If I have a wrestling shoe

1:18:40 yeah if I'm wrestling and there's a first match yeah in the first match of guy busses steel chair over another guys head yeah Coco the bird man beware is bleeding all over the place not cocoa everybody's cheering yes Coco I said it you know say it again here don't we're flying high for Cocoa yeah is the bird okay? Yes. If he's bleeding, everyone goes crazy that's fine but if you do it again in the second match And you do it in the third match, and the fourth match guess what happens? All the shock and awe and all the jaw dropping goes away because shock value is gone. Yeah! You can only surprise people so many times and that's why when the first guy in a open mic thinks he's really cool with his abortion joke That's fine but the fifth guy to do an abortion joke gets no reaction He's lying on the floor with shoulders against the met counting ring lights

1:19:28 and he is the loser, and I am the champion. That's what happens. Ooh yeah! I have material that i'll do for an opening like last weekend and the cool thing about the store is like when we're working the weekends a lot of times they're like hey, We need no opener Run up And you have like two minutes to prepare and get ready? And there's material that you did Like if you go up and start doing abortion jokes and shit to open a fucking friday night eight o'clock show You know you're not gonna get that opening spot again because it's stupid. Like you have to

1:20:17 get the crowd to relax and to get comfortable laughing. And that's mostly fluff material, so you've got to have both like I really there's stuff that uh... That i like to write about And I try to incorporate that in, but if it was just all stuff that I wanted to write about then i'm just a blogger. I'm not a comedian you know what? I mean like no, I disagree if you're making it funny. I don't think that uh The job title of comedian Is defined by the subjects you decide to write jokes about no But you can't there's no comic out there That is writing strictly

1:20:56 like even bill maher and jones stewart stuff have a range is because bill hicks in george carlin are dead that's why there's no one out there right now interestingly enough you know i dennis leary as a household name yes it's not because he robbed us says there's no cure for cancer That's actually a great joke and you should that's a good. That's a great job. It's not mine That's an old joke yeah, I mean it's good true though even on his own specials He he had audiences that were silenced by his material just like holy shit Yeah And those are on his specials those are people who filled in auditorium to see Bill fucking Hicks? And he got those people he shocked those people and I yeah, I think that

1:21:36 He was just if he was around today with the internet culture it would be a different fucking ballgame I could have swore that was somebody in your family like the long curly hair whatnot. Actually, I think it was carrot top I can't incidentally this year any like no care tops the one that has the puppet carrot top is the puppet Okay, never mind then. That's the guy Jeff made the jokes All right as comics do you guys like Jeff Dunham?

1:22:12 I can't say as comics because I mean everyone likes everything. I mean you lie on the other hand speak for all comics And he says no, I personally am not a fan of ventriloquism He's a show he's this fucking that's my opinion the ventriloquist the magic and even the prop guys and all its stuff is all Well it's how did you vote on there? I like magic Paul set me up for a joke, yeah. I voted no on prop comedy. See what i did? Oh shit! But the uh...I just don't consider it that way- now I admire the art of it. I was very cynical asshole at first like oh he's fucking prop guys, he's ventriloquist guys all bullshit blah blah blah It's just really corny and hacky and its gonna get a laugh no matter how unfunny it is because there's a puppet guy or whatever

1:22:58 And now over time I've mellowed out a little bit. I see the art in it, but I just don't count it as stand-up comedy. I consider it a different type of performance which is fine but just not what we do It doesn't count Let me challenge you guys for a second No disrespect And I know none of you are trashing on Jeff Dunham either But I hear... No! I think he's funny. I've seen him live Really? Yeah I think he's very hacky but the thing is I guess you'd have to come from the perspective that he is hacky, but what is the difference between Jeff Dunham? Doing the just you know there's there. I feel like it's extremely shallow base humor that reaches the masses very easily and it's easy to swallow right well What's the difference between just doing that and You know keeping those jokes they make you laugh out of your set I mean It's kind of the same premise is like your both not being fully

1:23:56 yourself on the stage. You're catering. In order to be a comic, I think you have to be... and like we had a discussion about this a couple weeks ago about, you know, we have a lot of different types of shows at The Comedy Store and sometimes will have shows come in that are You know, all ethnic shows or all gay shows or all... one group of people. And those comics can come in and they can do that material and be completely themselves on stage for that audience. And that one night a month they can kill. And that's fine! You're being yourself you're playing to the specific audience that came out just to see that and that'll work

1:24:37 but if you can make a diverse audience laugh, if you can make old people laugh and young people laugh and black people and white people and gay people and straight people or whatever across those lines that's a different art form than just going up and being yourself. So I mean it's not that we're not being true to ourselves but to an extent your performer You know what I mean? It's like...I have jokes that I'm so fucking tired of saying on stage That I'm so over But their applause breaks jokes There you know, it's at least sometimes you're in a situation. Yeah, you're in a situation You need to close strong open strong or everything? I understand that There is an art to uniting a crowd Paul saying there is uh when you have the old people the young people and there's a half Mexicans over there It was half whites over there. You have some married people over there. You got some first dates over there another thing to think about

1:25:30 You have to unite them. There is an art to that, getting them all on the same page I think if you make that audience laugh talking about subjects like sex and dogs and weather just blanket subjects If you make them laugh those aren't the people who are going look you up on Facebook Those aren't the people...you don't do anything...you know what i'm saying? Deeper more unique subjects that are tailored to your you know I just like political and I like those kind of there's times in place Yeah, if they all paid to see you then go crazy. They write true How are they gonna know that they would pay to see you? Well it takes a long time It takes a long time to find your voice on stage and like I don't tell jokes that I don't think are funny

1:26:20 That's the you know important thing. I don't tell that's comedy one I don't I don't tell jokes that I And I would never ever ever like how many times do we come to each other? Like hey, dude Have you ever heard a comic do this premise because I want to do it every freaking day But you're so paranoid about doing under somebody else's premise So you're constantly trying to be creative You're constantly trying to think of shit and a lot of it. I mean, I know Bob where's your notepad? Oh See? Oh shit. We've all- Mine's right there Every fucking self respecting comic has a notepad that they've got Because you think of shit and you scribble it down and then you try to write or whatever your method is Different comics have different methods Self respecting But Thanks for the business cards But you uh... Mines say corporate name on them but I got em

1:27:07 Just cross that out. Always be ready, always be ready because for all I know right now in two seconds like you think of the funniest thing i'll ever think of for all I know Right And I need to have that ready cause' I forget it two seconds later and you gotta be- and thats what- thats how we write and thats how we come up with what we think is funny and like You know theres Like I do jokes about dogs and relationships and family and all that Im not saying that's necessarily bad No but I mean thats all shit that im going through You know what I mean? All of it is shit thats in...and thats what a good comic does If you really want to elevate, and again I know we talked about like Louis CK earlier. Like he's one that can just... He looks so natural on stage the more comfortable you get in being able to go on stage and just talk and interact with the audience And kind of go off-the-cuff That's great! That's what we all hope for is to be more comfortable on stage and to be more natural But you still have to entertain the crowd because if you don't then you're not really

1:28:03 Okay, and like Bill Maher is one of my favorite comics today. Yeah, he's pretty good He's awesome but he doesn't have a broader audience because he gets too preachy sometimes and you know That's why I think he has his His hardcore fans right in his show is a great outlet for that because people tune into the show Because it's politically based But if you're seeing him in a stand-up format You know you it's you want to try to talk about subjects that are Broad groups can relate to because that's what people will laugh at is shit that they can really get a lot of broads to relate To my set I had to do it dangling in front of me for five minutes Jesus Christ, am I off the mic? What happened? I'd rather find a way to expose

1:28:49 A broader audience to subjects that they might not have. Yeah, but you gotta get don't like that Otherwise they just expose themselves I want a crowds to expose themselves people not only on first dates Which are going to be hesitant to laugh at a lot of things They want to laugh back and start on the first second date or whatever They're gonna you're gonna have co-workers that just spent eight hours together with the office aren't doing again tomorrow it's a process really?

1:29:36 You know, I thought your stuff was a little a little a little hacky. What are you talking about? Hackie? I'll tell you right now. I'll do a joke for you right now Yeah, and I just flew in from the kingdom of the madness Ian boy or my arms tired. All right Yeah, boom men and women not the same who know they're not yeah And it says on the side of Viagra pills if you have an erection for four hours or more you consult your physician You don't know anything about the macho man Randy Savage pharmaceutical companies cuz I don't call much friends with a 4-hour erection Yeah, call my friends to brag about it I messed up your joke, Randy. You told that ass backwards you know that yeah been a little out of practice here A little rusty but that's okay because i came here to talk politics not to be a clown Yeah keep your mouth shut Bob! Doin' the thing! You call your friends? To tell them about... The duration of your erections My point was Randy and for rest of you guys too is that thats a joke

1:30:25 It's a basic premise like the whole thing is seventh grade teacher who has sex with her male students Where was the teacher when I was in school, you know? Yeah, they're gonna build a wall. Yeah. Oh yeah big tall wall to our mobility stalls in the world right between Mexico and the United States Yeah Who are they gonna get to build the wall? I told it better though. It was the deliver yeah, I think you've done a better job in the past Randy of telling those then Leno did or Letterman Yeah, you know what Lopez so I gotta say? I mean I know this is old fucking news and people like when but when Leno was taking The Tonight Show back from Conan It was a Friday night it was 9 p.m.. And

1:31:27 It was the week before Jay Leno was taking The Tonight Show back. Everybody was shitting all over him and how bad of a guy he was, and he called me And he left a message on my phone. He's like, I got an email from your father. He says you want to be a comic? He says you wanna tell jokes and he's like, I just called to tell ya I think you should get up there and tell some jokes! That's the only way you're gonna make it happen. Why sit at home and not live out your dream if I would've done that I'd be working retail too. So get out there, I encourage you

1:32:08 And I'm sorry, I missed you have a good one and uh and I didn't answer it because when is unknown number? And I got a lot of credit card companies trying to get ahold of me. So I'm like okay now I'm not don't answer on no numbers but When I listened to the message, the first thing that came to my mind was what's going on right now in his life. He is at home literally right now on a Friday night calling me because of this and it's like you know everybody in the issue and i'm for taking back to show seriously got it literally has so yeah no idea that i've heard it i heard on the or should have made the iphone uh... purges its own messages after all is also why don't ask that's also i don't have paul's number seven my phone because i had on the message he knows your dad unknown by that just out man is a weird abilities contacted a lot of celebrities that have actually corresponded with them eka

1:33:05 Bob Newhart he has correspondence with I don't know if he hasn't a long time but how many restraining orders to see right it's your dad about the ratio is about two-to-one is your dad so where is your dad still working and where you was yeah I don't think we can really talk about that that's one does that's why I was asking if use it's not a it's not a big deal I didn't realize Amber Crombie in fish was so yeah you know they frown upon subjects that we talked about on the higher side chefs I mean they might those shirtless teenage boys. He might lose his position as the greeter Hold up, I really my dad in this thing leave that one alone and this economy You know my my dad's lucky to have the position But if you are in Fashion Valley Mall Those ABS, you know there's the family abs right there oh man

1:34:01 That's all yeah this economy No it really isn't it's responsible for the Occupy movement Which is why we're here Okay, I was just wondering what was going on see. I'm new I'm still working on my segways But that's good. We have a guy next door to the comedy store that works on his segways Yeah, you rent some out by the hour It's just tourists on Segway is everywhere this thing takes five or six people around on segways and we have to And when if you're working outside of the door You have to entertain them for five minutes and it's really uh, it's very silly give them a quick half made-up history You always get a standing ovation Yes Right

1:34:48 uh... because they're still standing there a writer and i guess it out of the road so that is no sense comical allotment segue guys are going to a transitional phase you know that uh... right there we go yet but as far as this argument movements concerned um... right all all five of us can agree that were being taken advantage of by banks and corporations. That basic sentence, and that is everybody involved in the Occupy movement would agree with that as well. And then the question becomes how do you fix that? It's electing someone I think we'll all agree wouldn't fix that. You can say maybe we just can't fix it. Maybe for just the rest of our lives they have too much power or we're fucked but if you were to fix it

1:35:39 Can you really fix it within capitalism? You can't fix it within an election. Then the next step is, can you fix it within a monetary system if not the one we currently have? Could we go to a gold standard? Could we do this? Could we get rid of the Fed? Could you do it within that structure or would we just be in the same boat 100 years from now? Then it becomes, can you do it within capitalism? I don't think that you can and you may say Mean the solution comes later, but first the question has to be asked it has to be answered No Can you do it within? You know this within this there's levels to it and we'll see how big it gets Well, what do you think like what is your solution if you can agree with that. How do you fix it? Do you just do it with regulation won't we just be in this boat once they elect one of their guys again who deregulates everything how can you fix it you know I mean

1:36:37 Whether you're in a capitalistic society or not, there's always going to be rich and poor. Not if there is no money! That just doesn't... What if we were all socialists? Think about the places on the planet right now that don't have a monetary system There isn't one Well, is there Africa? Yeah. Those are just the Africa is another thing I've seen some crazy Crazy videos on Africa just how it's so resource rich that my sister spent the last 10 years living There the whole goal of all the Western society has been an Eastern Society as well China's deeply involved in Africa right now But it's just keep it in turmoil She lived in Mozambique she lived in

1:37:22 through the Congo, Tanzania. She just moved back from Rwanda. Did she see the place where Obama was born? Oh There's a big shrine there got jokes No, but I mean like you I don't think we want to just because the majority of people don't want to live in true anarchy You know what? I mean. They don't want to live without a monetary I think they're afraid of the unknown But I think that if you look at something like The Venus Project if you look at the He's I'm a huge fan of course but uh, I mean if you look at something like a resource-based economy where you take the profit motive and exchange it for A motivation of dispersing the world's resources equally and sufficiently to everyone And you say well that sounds utopian how the fuck do you do that? There are ways though. You know if you take away profit as a motive then it becomes

1:38:23 You know, that's what keeping us back from using wind solar tidal energy geothermal energy really sustainable energies that even things that Nikola Tesla discovered in the fucking 1900s that he has been shut down for because there couldn't be a way to Coal is something you can control. You can easily control coal, you can't control wind once someone gets a turbine and you can't control sun when someone gets a solar panel. You can't control tidal waves once they're being harnessed. If I house my solar panels they will have the potential to actually sell electricity back to the electric company That is exactly why they haven't progressed in those things It's the profit motive

1:39:20 a the biggest argument is that everyone without money, without that would just be lazy and a piece of shit but look how active so many people are on the internet and no one's getting paid for that. But there would be no internet without a monetary system you know what I mean? I disagree because all... There's still ingenuity in this still people who build the things because we have the internet now We obviously incorporate technologies we have now That we were just Yeah but the way YouTube and all those sites are able to operate is off advertising

1:40:04 I mean that's how how is it you don't need money is something we created they run because people run them. They don't run because they bring in money yeah but they wouldn't be running without People want to do passionately wanna do that. I don't make money from this podcast. I want two podcasts thus You know things like things like right things like radio, you know It's gonna become like a doctor or heart surgeon because they want to but see that's where the technology With sewage and take out the trash and I think that can be automated oh I

1:40:50 It's, you know the way uh the way that people's living quarters work it's kind of in like rings out from the central The public hub and they have transports that go straight through. It's made to be completely efficient like a fat tire brewery You know everything is made to work I mean if that works in small doses But there's seven billion fucking people on the planet now which is... The planets never been able to house More than about a billion people without some sort of either natural disaster or disease wiping out a huge portion of the population Because they were ready for one. I think we are too and I think it needs to happen I mean, it's fucking there's too many people with this type of overpopulation There's no good answers through these questions. I mean Well

1:41:42 Do you remember when we were kids like I don't know how old you guys are all right That's just because of drugs. No, okay? Yeah, I was just gonna say like the fact that California could potentially break off and just drift off into the ocean I don't know. Whatever, you know? At least I had fun right yeah exactly that's why i own a bunch of property in Nevada. Yeah it'll be good one day huge Bob what do you think let's talk about Bob's ideas for fixing... A three point plan right here is that um 999 exactly thank you guys! It's basically uh three simple things right here is that first of all

1:42:30 privatizing the banks, the bank has to become centralized to a government. When we're creating money out of thin air everything just kind of trickles down from there so when our money's not backed up it's worth nothing and that's the thing our money is worth nothing so inflation is not controlled by governments that's a big problem alternative energy your second one were destroying the whole planet and everything else which leads me to the third one most important talking about the 1 billion people we can sustain in the 7 billion that we are We need stop making babies Everyone needs to stop making babies right away. Here's the deal like Paul you got two dogs, right? I do yeah You have like a two-year old dog and then like one and a half year old dog One is young dogs very young dogs. You got young dogs or talking about actual dogs here Yes Okay So the average dog lives And uh, you know on average somewhere from 11 to 12 issue years a little over a decade as your dog generally I'm just saying generally can do your 10s and 13s but Generally, you gotta deck it in change

1:43:26 That's the same time that a child stops being cute. So why do we just cling to these children? Every child you have so far, every child born so far... Actually this isn't true because a lot of us are still alive but every child grows up and gets old and dies! That's worthless there is no point in that. No that's totally true that will-that's inevitable yes and every child's gonna grow up in dies what was the point there is no point in that will be an end when we agree make people you have to take a plan because you have coffins and maybe a he put more smoke in the atmosphere as a part of my but most people generally they get buried his land it'd be after horizontally to pick up space on going to be created actually okay here they go so we gotta stop making people well then i think that uh...

1:44:15 We need to die off for a couple thousand years. What's funny is that most of the people who have decided to stop having kids or not have kids, for those reasons are the smarter people and then you've got really dumb fucking people that have five six kids Well they needed to be yelled at Yes yelling at them would solve everything it'll be a start well saying. Are you fucking with no prophylactics and that speaks to a higher truth the fact that you know people don't give a shit enough

1:45:00 You know what I mean? Like they don't care about people if people gave a shit. They'd say you know what it's not response It's selfish to have a child no, I'm not to have a child but that many kids I've said for years that I personally honestly believe that if I ever had a child that would be out of my own selfish gain because I wanted to have a child cuz I think that Childs life would be fucked you know they well certain point you know the day had to find out how we call somebody selfish for wanting to have a child or but i think somebody that has four five six children and i feel bad saying that is my sister has for kids but house some of those people those people who have four or five kids with drugs alcohol most of them are trying to start a junior young rnb band i've actually don't like there's only that there was a little bit that i do that up into an on-stage recently about mississippi right now they're trying to ban birth control the try to make this shit illegal

1:45:57 Mississippi. I mean, that's a return. Yeah like and that's what that totally speaks to my point of like it's the you know it's not the best and brightest that are breeding at this point But idiocracy is about yeah, that's a funny movie. It's a funny flick and we are we're breeding ourselves retarded And there's no natural selection or predators to kill us off I have bad eye contact lenses right now. I have bad eyesight so I'm like 2400 I should be dead There's no reason I can't find I can't find food to eat I can't I don't know I can't catch my prey and I can't avoid predators why am i not dead right? We shouldn't know what someone with Down syndrome looks like

1:46:37 We should not know what an adult with Down syndrome looks like. Fuck man, off the goddamn clock! Give me that notebook! No but that's true we kind of shouldn't- I mean that's funny but i mean... We shouldn't know what an adult with cerebral palsy looks like with people that aren't, I mean i'm certainly not saying we should bring a master race or anything like that. Come on Hitler! All im saying is if people weren't selfish and if people were more educated on what the overpopulation is actually... The effect it's actually having on societies on global level you know? If people were responsible we wouldn't have to

1:47:25 You know like China has the you know regulations on how many kids you can have all that. I don't think we should go there because I don't think that's right but people should be more responsible so it doesn't even have to be a fucking education. So people in Section 8 are going to just automatically be responsible they're gonna wake up and be like yeah, I don't think I think that Greg makes a great point. It starts with education, the whole structure that we have is so like it's it'd be a miracle for us to really transition to something like A Venus Project because of the conditioning and they were all under right now So it's like how do you hit the reset button? the chickens in china are only allowed to live electricity with power one and one of those are not telling it does aren't tickets they just have like one weird orange feather chicken is laying like one eighty eight horrible orange for an adult yet how they get those attempts at a bit of pandex press you were going right now with her origin i can make this time i may call it as believing about two long alright uh... so gives the police guys that i think if any of every number uh... ordered

1:48:27 Yeah, but I mean it's... Solution is dogs man. No more babies everyone have a dog? Everybody has a dog! And it was weird yeah, I had a doctor's appointment yesterday Have a turtle do whatever you gotta do. I had a doctor's appointment yesterday and this is the first time I've seen this doctor because we just switched insurance and she's looking at my chart and she's like oh You had a vasectomy and I'm like yes I did My wife and I don't We're not having kids and She's like you're too young for that And I'm like, yeah. That's what the first two doctors said which is why i had to keep going. I'm not bullshitting! I had to go to three urologists before I found one that would do the procedure because at the time I got it I was 32. 32 and they say that's too young? They were like you don't have any kids

1:49:12 You're too young and the doctors were like we're not gonna do you're gonna have to find another doctor And I was I was like so if I had it so a chick can get an abortion At 14, I'm fucking 32 and I gotta go shop for doctors just fucking get It's kind of I see um, that's how warped our view is it's because in the capitalistic society abortion I should be given a fucking tax break for having an asectomy. You know what? I make money off the abortions they make money Yes, bring bringing right. That's what i'm saying and the capitalistic model church makes money That's why do you think they always tell you they don't want to birth control everything else And they want you to have five kids Because the religious families will grow bigger right and can keep contributing money themselves

1:49:58 that is why they stand as well as why the catholic church initially because of the money it was wrong so there's a group growth religion we got a chance and capital which one is well with some of the world he has more money than the catholics law in the catholic church about it was so bad again needs to be abolished Okay, well I mean back us the gold standard and And then we're gonna get some alternative global warming so that there's there's jobs and we'll have no more health care in In occupy Wall Street. Does that make sense? Thank you very much before

1:50:37 For against The book anyone see that speech does the George Bush? Oh, oh no. That's that's the Rick Perry. Yeah, Barry What was that you sounded like you were making fun of Kerry? It wasn't a speech it was a debate when I was debating There was it was labeled at the baby's bill of debate and they actually there's people suing for the bait-and-switch rule right there because they did not get a debate and But what you know actually speaking of the Republicans and You know we talked said earlier was a side Reality show that just brings in money. They said they were gonna have upwards of 40 more debates before the election 40 more debates because they bring money

1:51:18 That's way too many debates. You're talking about having debates everywhere, up down left right north south east west it doesn't matter you're gonna have debates that are East of the Pacific Ocean West of London England South of Mars and North of hell! Yeah that's too many debates I don't like it It's good to hear from you again Randy man Don't like it? Good to be back yeah Spaced out a little bit went over the place took a trip into the danger zone but now I'm back doing my thing yeah Was Maverick there? I don't think i know him. Yeah, what is he the champion? I'm coming for his title! I thought you were the champion. Well I am the champion of everything in between all over the place man. Everything except wrestling. I'm working on that but uh... Alright ill take it yeah I can take a joke yeah That's still good It's 99% of the way there What to do

1:52:09 But to round this thing out we have talked about this for a long time Dave how do you think this gets fixed? I mean, hi like we kind of talked. I'm trying to go one one by one We get we know it's a it's a huge question so obviously we get sidetracked and get all the way to pro wrestling but How do you fix it? I think that if you were to build, the analogy I've been saying is if you were take a car that you needed to suit modern technology and the modern society we built. Wouldn't be easier to build a car from scratch than try to refurbish a Model T? Oh of course! And thats an analogy im putting forth with We need to bring...to build something new You need to blow that model T up first in order to build something

1:52:57 But what do you do with the billion people that are in the Model T while you're building a new car? I mean, if you're talking again about ending the monetary system and political system and things like that. That might be what needs to happen for it to change but that's some pretty drastic It is drastic and it is scary. That's not gonna happen naturally There's gonna like there could be like a solar flare or something that knocks out the power grid for six months or something Like that, that could initiate a change like that I think with debt and profit and everything being wiped clean because think about it without computers

1:53:40 But how are you gonna track because there's no gold at the system does the system I need to collapse Do you know how many people would just be like in mad panic and mag? It doesn't have to be that way water. It doesn't have to be that drastic without functioning fuel fuel everything right it would get it could be a lot of but it doesn't it doesn't have to it doesn't have to I think it will have to in order for it to have the kind of change that you're talking about. To have a severe change, like a complete shift? But what we're seeing in this Occupy Wall Street movement is enough people saying, I don't want to play this game whether they have a home or don't have a home Have a job or don't have a job They see that the game is rigged and even though they might be doing enough to sustain themselves They've committed to the idea. I don't want to play. I'm going to keep playing while everybody else's That's my position

1:54:31 I'm gonna keep playing as well as everyone else's. I work. I'm gonna work 55 60 hours a week during this fucking holiday season once Black Friday hits It's why people ask my fucking so racist that it's because I work in fucking retail But um I'm gonna play the game as long as everyone else is but from the top of my lungs, shout that hey if i can get you guys to play another game. I would love too! But im not going to quit my job because thats not going to serve any purpose I hate it. I don't want to do it and that's why preach so hard like hey We could be doing something better But I think in the Occupy Wall Street movement you're seeing enough people saying that this game is capitalistic game This game of Monopoly essentially is not what I want to play and the alarm bells are sounding And I don't think there has to be a mass collapse, I think obviously that would help if the game completely collapsed

1:55:30 then some people's brainwashing is so deep that they're gonna hold on to their last dollar and when they're homeless, they're gonna hate themselves for losing the game because they are so indoctrinated too. And they aren't going to understand that You know, the reason that you've been so fucked is not necessarily your fault. There's people making money off your money and you owe interest to any... for any loan you've taken out, you owe interest but you can't print money they can! And it's just a game of musical chairs that will eventually run out for more and more people It's a shell game I mean in.. So either everyone does have to lose- I would hope just that isn't the case That everyone has to lose

1:56:12 For or the majority of people have to lose to want to switch the game But a lot of people just need to see that. The game is rigged rigged That's what needs to happen and that's what this Occupy movement is trying to expose right now Well, I think we're at the beginning of what'll be uh maybe a few years a few decades Maybe a hundred year change might be the very beginning Of a huge change an answer to your question will be the two biggest solutions are your biggest solutions mine are centralizing our money and stop making people I'm actually as funny as we made that and it was chunks of a bit. I was working on so I practiced it here, but work it out You know but I mean you we hashed it out, but uh nevertheless Yeah, yeah the drugs and things the um You know no more weed jokes all pipe down seriously. I can't do this really It's kind of really to pot calling kettle black there We can do this forever is just kind of really have a little still a little green to this whole thing Okay anyway

1:57:08 Pons brag up. I'm like a tell of the pun they can do this we're doing this thing they Really feel be blunt That's good, that was pretty good What I do I did well it was a joint effort All right, see it doesn't end. Yes centralizing money stop making people and the ones of the people who are in their 20s 30s or still here will just have to deal with a decade or two of shit before things get better when there's no more babies to pay for and They're always be that's pretty much I think education too, like... Now we have emotions. The friend that i was having the discussion with last week, the conservative who you know really good friend of mine and respect his opinion but he kept they always go back to this point about well it's America it's a free market anybody can achieve anybody can do anything anybody can become a millionaire you can become the one percent and its always people that had

1:58:12 upper to upper middle class upbringing a college education handed to them You know what I mean? It's never like, I don't hear people saying that they had to live out of their car and work three jobs to put themselves through school and then go into debt. And start life with a crazy debt just to get an education so that they could you know what i mean like if it was a level playing field to have a level playing field you've got to have a level start. Those are slogans they tell ya. If your school spends more money on metal detectors than it does books you don't have an equal chance To make it to that 1% that somebody does, that's coming up in an affluent neighborhood and an affluent school. And is going to get into Yale and all this shit versus people who grow up in poverty... People who work hard I mean that's part of a midlife crisis when you just finally wake up

1:59:07 I think, you know people say because you've been working and you've been working and you're really not that well off. And uh... You finally wake up and your like.. People make jokes that you just buy a nice car or something? In this sick society how else do you treat your illness other than to buy something? Drugs! Yeah Or food, or porn Which of course all cost money Except for porn Porn's free! Gambling, that true Wait a minute God love that's one part of the internet culture that I'd really like to incorporate in real life. Here is what killed me about you porn, and we were issued on this two hours ago. To wrap it up... They socialized our porn! It's great that its free and everything but here's the thing if you have... There are no standards anymore god damnit No there not heres a problem

1:59:53 I don't want to see a Japanese girl with A-cups getting pissed on. What would you prefer, Brazilian with D's? There you go! I had one with Cs for a few months and it ended badly The point is this... Every guy in the US If there are 20 new porn videos per day And a couple million guys are all whacking off to it Here's the problem We're all whacking off pretty much to the exact same videos That's creepy I don't like it because what's that? Are you actually thinking of these guys while you're whacking off? Not the guys, I'm saying all the guy as you know. Like an iPad Circle Drift? You and all your buddies are whacking off to the same five videos on a daily basis or whatever the case is. Ya are! And that's creepy, you've socialized your porn What was it before though when we had VHS tapes

2:00:49 And magazines. Because no one had the same, the guy in South Dakota didn't have the same VHS tape as the guy in Florida Right Okay now... Well it's physically impossible to get VHS tapes Right Say there are stores you know where they have all these different weird videos There is professional stuff and amateur stuff You know I mean like I said The guy in Idaho and a random Chinese guy in New York City most likely don't have the same stack of porn But now we all have the exact same porn We're all whacking into the same 5 or 10 videos i don't know lately it's been a video of them jamming that rod up to dot these hats is that one we can work at the back i thought this musical score for that though was was touching uh... yeah i was a great score uh... they go back to our solutions for the bigger world problems and i just didn't like a lot honestly think that within the past thirty years a m same with marketing in everything that there has been any

2:01:46 like porn has been a major industry and I think the internet actually did kill the porn industry because they're very much alive. Well no it is but a lot of it is saturated with amateur porn and people wanting to do their own thing whereas you had these companies... Chicks will suck a dick for a T-shirt these days. It's natural! I don't give my girlfriend t-shirts every time Greg that's my sister. Thank you Interestingly enough there is a new movement in the porn industry called uh, I think it's ejaculate Wall Street They're doing yeah, just whacking off on the streets now because they're mad about high porn prices and that does not I heard that Pamela Anderson was gonna help out they were gonna occupy her My goodness

2:02:34 My goodness. There's room for like 20,000 phone test sheets We could do this all day. Is there anyone else in the group that had a solution they wanted to offer? Oh, I said mine. Dave said his. I think Bob's at his. Paul says... Start blowing shit up! Oh Randy, Randy wrap it up for us. Yeah, I've been thinking about Occupy Wall Street we're talking about alternative fuels We're talking about population and centralizing our money but if there is one way to solve every single problem this is my solution and get ready because when only say it once in the never again

2:03:18 We need a second referee outside. That's what we need. Ooh, yeah! Too much cheating by the big boss man. Yeah, we got a referee because the first one always gets hit over the head with a fucking chair. Two referees too easily distracted by the slickster at the ringside and I don't like it. Yeah that's my solution that's my two cents that's my drop on the hat i'm out of here all right ladies and gentlemen That is another episode of the Hireside Chats. Randy, thanks for joining us I'm glad you could make it Bob thanks for bringing him. You're welcome! Bob Hanson and Paul Harmon please check them out uh you won't see them online but if your in San Diego... I'm online! paulhcomedy.com

2:03:57 and jokes twitter and facebook yes it's a social media occupy bob isms uh... every day you can't save you'll see him spin in fire no b uh... if you can see them there then then you'll see a meta raves nationwide um... i'm gonna be a lot more active on the higher side chats is going to become more of a blog i'ma put more news stories up their of from a bereavement by occupier might as well you know just I think it would just do more for the website. And also, you know we are on Stitcher. I forget to mention it all the time they asked me to because they were nice enough to put this show on there which is a channel of sorts so if you have a smartphone please download the Stitcher app every great podcast is on there and also The Hireside Chats We will see you later

2:04:51 I've seen you around, but I really can't be sure. All the hats you're meant up is in your...